In Transition
Hi.
I’ve thought of so many different ways to kick off an introduction, and all of them seem so great until you get to the part where you actually do said introduction. At first, I was going to do a video series that would at least hide the manifesto I will be spewing into some visually stunning scenes and whatnot so then you could have something pretty to look at. Unfortunately, it is taking more effort than I can possibly give, so for now we’ll stick with the written ramblings and save video for another day.
Wait… I Don’t Know Who You Are.
Oh, right, I posted a link to my site for my photos, and you may have never met me before. Hell, it’s about time for me to do another one anyway because the last few months had so many changes happening that it’s worth to get everyone up-to-speed on me, the person writing this post.
Hi! I’m Lorelei (she/her), and I’m a transgender person from Atlanta, Georgia, in the United States. I’m currently living in Ireland in an attempt to immigrate into the country, or somewhere else within the European Union. When I’m not focusing on a massive lifestyle change, I like to take photos (as you’ve probably seen on the site), run, and attempt to play guitar.
There’s a lot more we can get into about all of the questions, but this will work for now. We can save the nitty gritty stuff for other posts, or when I’ve had one too many pints and need to ramble into the internet.
Okay, That Works.
But Why Are You Doing This?
Good question. When I was going through the process of planning a swift exit from the country in under two months, I had slapped together some reasons to folks on why I was trying to leave so quickly.
To catch you up:
I had come out as transgender in April 2024.
Around that time, Project 2025 was getting promoted around the news sites as the guide Trump would use if he was elected.
The Project plan is aggressively anti transgender, making me a target just because I am “the enemy”.
Decided America would not be safe in a Conservative-controlled Executive, Legislative, and Judicial Branch Government.
Sold as much as I could, sacrificed more to be out by 2025. I landed in Dublin in hopes to work here.
To Summarize: aggressive anti-transgender propaganda and legislation was being promoted as Trump’s policy around the time that I was coming out, and when he won I took his words seriously that he was going to implement it and I decided I could not risk staying to find out since I was going to be a target of said policies if I did, so I bailed.
After a single month in office, all I can say is that I’m glad I did.
Oh, So It’s a Vacation? Lucky You
There’s nothing to romanticize about this situation. Not even by a country mile. It’s also one of the things I hear the most about being over here, away from the chaos back in the states, and how it must be so much fun to be in Ireland.
I have days that are fun, yes, but let’s also consider that I cannot return to the land where I was born and lived for my entire life for four years, if not ever. I am quite literally in exile from my own country because they have chosen to erase my existence for the most nefarious of reasons, and all I want to do is just stay alive. Unless those of you choose to come over to see me, there is a great chance we will never see each other again. Sure, video works, but it’s not the same; there are so many intricate details and special moments you have from in-person friendships, and to lose your entire community in a matter of months can really shatter your sense of belonging.
That’s not to say I’m not making friends over here, because I am, but there are so many dynamics at play that I don’t quite understand, and it gets confusing at times because of having to learn how to navigate each one. It’s hard enough at trying to understand the rules of engagement in Irish Culture from the brash, extrovert-forward ways of how I portrayed myself in American Culture, but to also learn how to do so as a woman. It’s happening - it’s slow but consistent - but it’s not there, and my ties to friends and loved ones back home gets muddled in the mess as well.
Well Shit, That Doesn’t Sound Fun
It’s not, but that’s okay. Things aren’t great for any of us right now, and now is the time for making progress where I can until I can find my next place.
Right now, I’m over here on a tourist stamp, which lasts a total of 90 days. I arrived on 1 January, which means I’m over half-way through my stamp. Throughout the onslaught of job applications, I have only heard back from two positions, which will be able to fill the position - if I am offered said position - after my stamp expires.
Which means I have to leave, after I just got settled here. To where? I don’t know yet, I still need to figure that part out. But the lack of a proper homestead and living out of suitcases seems like a thrill (and believe me, there are days where it’s amazing), but it comes at the cost of not knowing where home is, because you don’t have one anymore.
But that’s okay.
It has to be, because that’s all that I can do now, and embrace it as my reality. There is nothing wrong with being able to sit in the loss and recognize it at face value. I have never felt so alone before, but I’ve also never felt more alive than now. The only person that can help me out of this situation is myself, and by the mercy of Dolly Parton I’m doing the best I can with what I got.
But I Want to Help…
Honestly, I don’t know how you can. Well… maybe in one way. Let’s talk about it.
This situation is chaotic, and I’m sure for my American friends, seeing the news about trans erasure and my current situation can make things awkward. It feels compelling to try and offer advice where you can, but now we’re in a situation where there really isn’t anything we can do about this. Not individually, at least, and this isn’t the kind of manifesto where I get political (yet).
However, the thing I need the most from my American friends is: include me in your life like you did when I was back home. To go from having you minutes down the street to five time zones away does not change how much I care about you. The current political situation does not mean that the injustices happening to me invalidate yours. If anything, it can help us be that much better because we can support each other through this terrible time. By excluding me from it, you’ve essentially revoked the permissions I had back home, when what I need the most at this time is a belonging in my community. My American Community.
I’m not asking for you to bare it all if it doesn’t feel comfortable, but can we talk like we’re friends again? It’s still me, and I want to be there for you like you were there for me through the chaos of 2024? Let’s try to find some solid ground together as the world falls apart, or maybe we can even hold it together by making new memories with old friends in new situations.
That’s a long enough rambling for now; more of these to come in either blog or video format, and they’ll cover a smorgasbord of topics and whatnot. You’ll find out more about life abroad, as a broad, and so much more as I inconsistently post these things.